There is a lot of bitterness-guilting that goes on in Christianity. If you suffer and aren’t serene and forgiving and jumping for joy about it you are guilted for being bitter. This is a sibling of the whole romanticizing of suffering thing. But most of bitterness is an emotion. A lot of people who are bitter (including myself) had made serious attempts to forgive all those that harmed us and often make headway. Forgiveness is an act of will but often that doesn’t change the emotional component at all (in fact it often worsens it). So our bitterness remains but it’s largely an emotion. And there’s the rub, in bitterness-guilting one is implying that one is culpable for their emotions. As if one could snap their fingers and change their emotions!